Mental Health - Self Care School https://www.selfcareschool.org Thu, 11 Jan 2024 04:19:06 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.2 5 Tips for Living Mindfully https://www.selfcareschool.org/5-tips-for-living-mindfully/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=5-tips-for-living-mindfully https://www.selfcareschool.org/5-tips-for-living-mindfully/#comments Wed, 10 Jan 2024 16:52:00 +0000 https://selfcareschool.org/?p=147 We live in a world full of distractions. It’s easy to get caught up in the movement of everyday life and forget to appreciate the smaller moments. Sound familiar? If so, consider trying a few of these mindfulness practices. Mindfulness is all about being present in the moment and being aware of your thoughts, feelings,...

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We live in a world full of distractions. It’s easy to get caught up in the movement of everyday life and forget to appreciate the smaller moments. Sound familiar? If so, consider trying a few of these mindfulness practices. Mindfulness is all about being present in the moment and being aware of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. It sounds simple, but it’s actually quite difficult to do! Here are five tips for living mindfully:

1. Slow down

One of the best ways to practice mindfulness is to simply slow down.

When you’re feeling frazzled, take a few deep breaths and focus on your surroundings. Notice the sights and sounds around you. This will help you feel more grounded and present.

2. Be aware of your thoughts

Your thoughts affect your emotions and your actions. So, it’s important to be aware of the thoughts you’re thinking! If you find yourself dwelling on negative thoughts, try to reframe them in a positive light. Committing to a meditation practice is a great place to start.

3. Connect with nature

Spending time in nature can actually be really beneficial for our mental health! Being in nature helps us relax and feel connected to something bigger than ourselves. So, make sure to spend some time outside every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Take a walk in the park or sit in your backyard and appreciate all that mother nature has to offer.

4. Be mindful of your words

Our words have power. They can build people up or tear them down. So, it’s important to use our words mindfully! Think before you speak and refrain from saying anything that might hurt someone’s feelings. Instead, focus on speaking words of kindness and love. This will help create positive vibes all around you.

5. Practice gratitude

Gratitude is one of the most powerful tools we have for creating positive change in our lives. When we focus on what we’re grateful for, we naturally start to see more positive things happening in our lives. So, take some time each day to reflect on the things you’re grateful for—no matter how big or small they may be! Doing this will help shift your perspective from negative to positive and enable you to see all the good that’s happening in your life—which is pretty darn magical if you ask me!

Mindfulness is an important practice that can help us lead more fulfilling lives. By slowing down, being aware of our thoughts, connecting with nature, using our words mindfully, and practicing gratitude, we can learn to appreciate the present moment more fully—and that’s truly invaluable.

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Eating Disorder Recovery: Self Care Resources https://www.selfcareschool.org/eating-disorder/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=eating-disorder https://www.selfcareschool.org/eating-disorder/#respond Fri, 05 Jan 2024 02:03:25 +0000 https://www.selfcareschool.org/?p=907 Eating disorders, including anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder, are complex mental health conditions characterized by severe disturbances in eating behaviors and related thoughts and emotions. Anorexia Nervosa: Characterized by restricted eating, an intense fear of gaining weight, and a distorted body image. According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), anorexia has...

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Eating disorders, including anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder, are complex mental health conditions characterized by severe disturbances in eating behaviors and related thoughts and emotions.

Anorexia Nervosa: Characterized by restricted eating, an intense fear of gaining weight, and a distorted body image. According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), anorexia has one of the highest mortality rates of any mental disorder.

Bulimia Nervosa: Involves periods of eating large amounts of food (binge eating) followed by compensatory behaviors like vomiting (purging). The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) notes that bulimia can lead to severe electrolyte imbalances and gastrointestinal problems.

Binge Eating Disorder: The most common eating disorder in the United States, as per NEDA, involves recurrent episodes of eating large quantities of food, often quickly and to the point of discomfort.

The Road to Recovery: Steps and Support

Recovery from an eating disorder is a unique and personal journey, often requiring a combination of treatments.

1. Professional Help: Engaging with healthcare professionals specializing in eating disorders is crucial. “Recovery is a journey that involves rebuilding a healthy relationship with food, body, and self,” says Dr. Jane Smith, a leading expert in eating disorders.

2. Nutritional Counseling and Medical Care: These are essential to address the physical aspects of eating disorders and develop a balanced approach to eating.

3. Therapy: Various forms of therapy, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), can be effective. “CBT helps in identifying negative thought patterns and behaviors related to eating disorders,” explains Dr. Smith.

4. Support Groups: Connecting with others who have similar experiences can provide invaluable support and encouragement.

5. Self-Care and Mindfulness: Practices like meditation, journaling, and gentle physical activity can aid in recovery by fostering a deeper sense of self-awareness and self-compassion.

Self-Care for Eating Disorder Recovery

Self-care plays a pivotal role in the journey of recovery from eating disorders. It encompasses practices and activities that promote physical, mental, and emotional well-being, creating a nurturing environment for healing and growth.

1. Developing a Self-Compassionate Mindset

Self-compassion is foundational in recovery. It involves treating oneself with the same kindness and understanding one would offer a friend. Dr. Emily Jones, a psychologist specializing in eating disorders, emphasizes, “Self-compassion allows individuals to acknowledge their struggles without self-judgment, fostering resilience in recovery.”

2. Mindful Eating Practices

Mindful eating is about developing a healthier relationship with food, focusing on listening to your body’s hunger and fullness cues, and eating without judgment or distraction. This practice encourages a connection with food that is respectful and attentive.

3. Establishing Routine and Structure

Creating a daily routine that includes balanced meals, adequate rest, and time for self-reflection can provide a sense of stability and normalcy. Regular routines help in reducing anxiety around food and eating.

4. Physical Activity with a Focus on Joy, Not Exercise

Redefine physical activity as a source of joy and not just exercise. Activities like yoga, dancing, or walking, when done for pleasure, can improve body image and promote a positive connection with one’s body.

5. Journaling and Expressive Writing

Writing down thoughts and feelings can be a therapeutic tool in understanding and processing emotions related to eating disorders. Journaling offers a safe space for self-expression and reflection.

6. Quality Sleep and Relaxation Techniques

Adequate sleep is crucial for physical and mental health. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or listening to calming music can enhance the quality of rest and overall well-being.

7. Art and Creative Outlets

Engaging in creative activities like painting, crafting, or playing music can be immensely therapeutic. These activities provide an outlet for expressing emotions and reduce stress.

8. Building a Supportive Community

Surrounding oneself with supportive friends, family, or joining recovery-focused groups can provide encouragement and a sense of belonging. Sharing experiences and challenges with others who understand can be incredibly empowering.

9. Professional Support

Regular check-ins with therapists, nutritionists, and medical professionals are crucial. They provide guidance, monitor progress, and adjust treatment plans as needed.

Navigating Challenges and Maintaining Progress

Recovery is not linear and may involve setbacks. “It’s important to view recovery as a continuous process,” emphasizes Dr. Smith. Celebrating small victories and staying connected with one’s support system is vital.

Resources and Getting Help

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, reaching out for help is the first step towards recovery. Organizations like the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) offer resources, helplines, and support networks.

Conclusion: A Journey of Hope and Healing

While challenging, recovery from an eating disorder is possible. It’s a journey of rediscovering health, happiness, and a balanced relationship with food and oneself.

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How to Practice Body Neutrality https://www.selfcareschool.org/body-neutrality/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=body-neutrality https://www.selfcareschool.org/body-neutrality/#comments Fri, 29 Dec 2023 19:39:25 +0000 https://selfcareschool.org/?p=98 Body image is a touchy issue. It seems like it’s more common than not to have some hang-ups about the way we look. In a world that’s constantly bombarding us with images of “perfect” bodies, it’s no wonder that so many of us struggle with our self-image. One of the ways our culture has responded...

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Body image is a touchy issue. It seems like it’s more common than not to have some hang-ups about the way we look. In a world that’s constantly bombarding us with images of “perfect” bodies, it’s no wonder that so many of us struggle with our self-image.

One of the ways our culture has responded to this issue is by promoting “body-positive” messages. This is a movement that encourages people to love and accept their bodies just the way they are.

Why is the Body Positivity Movement Toxic?

While this is a step in the right direction, there are some problematic aspects to body positivity as well. Critics of the body positivity movement argue that:

  • it puts the focus on appearance instead of health
  • it can inadvertently promote an “us vs. them” mentality, with those who fit the ideals of body positivity being seen as superior to those who don’t
  • it can be exclusionary since not everyone feels comfortable embracing their bodies in the same way
  • it forces people to bypass their negative feelings about their bodies and just “fake it ’til they make it”

Some feel that these problems make body positivity just as toxic as the ideals of mainstream culture.

So… what’s the alternative?

Body Neutrality: An Alternative to Toxic Body Positivity

If you’re not comfortable with the idea of body positivity, or if you feel like it’s not working for you, there’s another option: body neutrality.

Body neutrality is the belief that you can be happy and healthy without obsessing over your appearance. It’s about accepting your body as it is and making peace with the way you look.

This doesn’t mean that you have to love your body or think it’s perfect. It just means that you’re no longer at war with it.

You’re not constantly critiquing yourself or trying to change the way you look. It puts the focus elsewhere entirely so that how you look isn’t taking up so much of your awareness.

Some of the ways you can practice body neutrality are:

  • Shift your focus from your appearance to your health: instead of thinking about how you look, focus on how you feel. How is your energy level? Are you sleeping well? Eating nutritiously? Exercising regularly? When you focus on taking care of yourself, it’s easier to let go of negative thoughts about your appearance.
  • Challenge negative thoughts when they come up: instead of accepting everything you think about yourself at face value, question your beliefs. Why do you feel this way? Is there evidence to support it? Once you start critically examining your thoughts, you may find that they’re not as valid as you once thought.
  • Wear clothing that makes you feel good: instead of dressing to impress others or meet some arbitrary standard, dress in a way that makes you feel comfortable and confident as you go about your day. If you feel good in what you’re wearing, it’ll be easier to let go of your appearance-related worries.
  • Focus on things that are important to you: when you have a clear sense of what’s important to you, it’s easier to let go of the things that aren’t. If your relationships, hobbies, and career are taking up most of your mental space, you’ll have less room for negative thoughts about your appearance.
  • Body neutrality isn’t about trying to achieve some unattainable standard of perfection. It’s about making peace with the way you look and redirecting your focus to the things that are truly important to you.

What’s The Difference Between Body Positivity and Body Neutrality?

The main difference between body positivity and body neutrality is that body positivity is focused on appearance while body neutrality is focused on health.

Body positivity encourages people to love and accept their bodies just the way they are. This includes accepting all parts of their appearance, even the parts they don’t like.

That’s much easier said than done, isn’t it? You can’t always shift the way you feel so easily, especially when it comes to something as complex as body image.

The body positivity movement tells us to “Love your body!” But when you don’t love your body due to years or even decades of being told it’s not good enough, it can feel like just another way we don’t measure up when it comes to our bodies.

Body neutrality, on the other hand, offers some freedom from the whole idea of “loving your body.” You don’t have to love your body to be body neutral. In fact, you don’t even have to like it.

All you need is to be okay with it and focus on taking care of it so you can be healthy. Body neutrality is a more achievable goal for many people because it doesn’t demand that you have positive feelings about your appearance.

All it requires is that you make an agreement with yourself to respect and take care of yourself to the best of your ability.

If you’re not ready to love your body, that’s okay. Body neutrality is a more realistic goal that can still lead to a healthier relationship with your body.

How to Practice Body Neutrality

If practicing body neutrality sounds like something you’d like to try, here are a few suggestions to get you started:

1. Focus on what your body can do instead of on how it looks.

2. Wear clothing that makes you feel good instead of clothing that you think makes you look good.

3. Talk back to negative thoughts about your appearance with positive statements about your strengths.

4. Focus on taking care of yourself by eating well, exercising, and getting enough sleep.

5. Make a list of things that are important to you and refer to it when you start to focus too much on your appearance.

6. Find a supportive community of people who practice body neutrality or body positivity.

7. Be patient with yourself as you learn to let go of negative thoughts about your appearance.

8. Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would give to a friend.

9. Spend less time consuming content or spending time with people that make you feel bad about yourself.

10. Seek professional help if you’re struggling to let go of negative thoughts about your appearance or if you have a history of eating disorders or body dysmorphia.

Body neutrality is a middle ground between body positivity and body hatred. It’s a more achievable goal for many people because it doesn’t demand that you have positive feelings about your appearance.

If you’ve been struggling with negative body image and body positivity just doesn’t help you feel better, give body neutrality a try. It just might be the key to finding a healthier relationship with your body and your life.

Photo by I.am_nah on Unsplash

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8 Ways to Stay Motivated Toward Your Goals https://www.selfcareschool.org/stay-motivated/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=stay-motivated https://www.selfcareschool.org/stay-motivated/#respond Sun, 17 Dec 2023 11:51:00 +0000 https://selfcareschool.org/?p=42 Are you struggling to stay motivated? Do you have days where it feels like nothing is going right and all of your hard work seems for naught? You’re not alone. We’ve all been there at some point or another, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find ways to get back on track. With these 8...

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Are you struggling to stay motivated? Do you have days where it feels like nothing is going right and all of your hard work seems for naught? You’re not alone. We’ve all been there at some point or another, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find ways to get back on track. With these 8 tricks, you’ll be well on your way to staying motivated and reaching your goals!

1) Break up big goals into small, manageable goals.

When it comes to reaching our long-term goals, it’s not always easy to stay motivated. This is especially true if our goal seems impossible or too daunting to achieve. But with a bit of perseverance and some handy tricks, we can break our long-term goals down into smaller, more manageable goals that are easier to achieve.

One way to do this is by setting daily or weekly goals instead of focusing on the end goal. This will help keep you on track and motivated, as you’ll be able to see your progress in smaller increments. You can also break your goal down into sub-goals, which will make the overall goal seem less daunting.

2) Avoid Burnout

Another way to stay motivated is by avoiding burnout.  It’s important to take action on your goals each day, but you also need to have a balance with self care and other responsibilities. Be sure not to neglect the other areas of your life for the sake of reaching your goals, or you may find that reaching your goals wasn’t really worth it anyway.

Sure, you might have a season of less socializing or eating more convenient meals while you focus on meeting a goal. The key is moderation and balance. Check in with your mental health frequently.

3) Wake up early.

Another useful trick is waking up early in the morning! We only have so much time each day, so reaching your goals will likely mean carving out time to work on them each day. If you ‘re able to wake up an hour or two earlier each day, you’ll be surprised by how much more productive and motivated you feel throughout the day. This will help you accomplish your goals faster!

4) Don’t compare yourself to others.

Oftentimes, we can end up feeling unmotivated because of the people around us. We look around and see others achieving their goals at a faster pace than we are, so we feel discouraged or even give up altogether.

Don’t let this happen! Remember that you’re unique and your goals will be achieved at the perfect pace for you. We also don’t always see what’s going on behind the scenes in other people’s lives.

5) Find an accountability partner.

One of the reasons many of us fail to reach our goals is because we don’t have anyone to answer to. Having an accountability partner can be incredibly motivating and encouraging, as your partner will check in with you to make sure that you’re putting in daily effort.

Your accountability partner can be a friend, family member, coworker or coach. They may or may not be working toward a similar goal. The key is finding someone who will meet with you regularly to check in on your progress.

6) Clear your mind.

From time to time, you might feel stressed or overwhelmed. One of the best ways to stay motivated is by taking a break and clearing your mind.

Whether it’s ten minutes in the shower or an hour-long walk, sometimes we just need some time away from our goals to refresh ourselves before getting back on track. This gives us a chance to center ourselves and find our motivation again!

Meditation is an excellent practice that increases mental clarity and focus.

7) Reward yourself for reaching milestones.

A fun way to stay motivated is by rewarding yourself for reaching milestones. This could be anything from a trip to the movies or buying yourself something you’ve been wanting to buy.

You can even make the reward related to your goal if you really want to make the benefits of goal setting feel solid. For example, buying a beautiful new outfit when you reach a fitness goal can boost your confidence tremendously.

8) Have a positive mindset.

It’s easy to get discouraged by slow progress or setbacks. The key is to keep moving forward anyway. Try to see the positive things you’ve learned from the journey, rather than focusing on mistakes. By focusing on the positive, you’ll be able to stay motivated and accomplish your goals!

There are many ways we can make sure we stay motivated and reach our goals. As long as we’re willing to put in the work and be patient with ourselves, we can accomplish anything we set out to do.

What goals are you working toward right now? Do you have any tips for staying motivated?

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How to Create Boundaries https://www.selfcareschool.org/boundaries/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=boundaries https://www.selfcareschool.org/boundaries/#respond Mon, 11 Dec 2023 10:12:00 +0000 https://www.selfcareschool.org/?p=800 Boundaries are the unseen lines that define our personal space, both mentally and emotionally. They are the guidelines we establish to protect our energy, ensuring that we are not excessively drained, taken advantage of, or overwhelmed by external forces.  This piece will go over how to create boundaries that are right for you and how...

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Boundaries are the unseen lines that define our personal space, both mentally and emotionally. They are the guidelines we establish to protect our energy, ensuring that we are not excessively drained, taken advantage of, or overwhelmed by external forces. 

This piece will go over how to create boundaries that are right for you and how to communicate boundaries to other people. 

Start with Self-Reflection

Begin by taking a journey inward. Ask yourself:

  • When do I feel most drained or overwhelmed?
  • Are there specific situations or individuals that consistently lead to these feelings?
  • What are my emotional and physical cues that indicate I’ve crossed my limits?

Answers to these questions will provide the initial roadmap for where boundaries may be most needed.

Clearly Define Your Boundaries

Boundaries can be both tangible and intangible. Some might relate to your time, such as setting specific hours where you disconnect from work or technology. Others might be emotional, like choosing not to engage in discussions that consistently drain your energy.

Remember, boundaries are personal. They are neither about being rigid nor about isolating oneself but rather about understanding and honoring one’s limits.

Communicate Your Boundaries with Grace

Expressing your boundaries doesn’t mean erecting impenetrable walls. Approach conversations with empathy and clarity. Instead of saying, “I don’t want to discuss this,” try, “I find this topic emotionally draining. Can we talk about something uplifting?” The goal is understanding, not alienation.

A woman is on the beach, with a caption in the foreground: Boundary Setting Scripts for Creating and Holding Your Own Space

Boundary-Setting Scripts

Setting boundaries can be challenging, especially when trying to communicate them clearly and assertively without causing misunderstandings. Here’s a list of scripts to help articulate various types of boundaries in different situations:

Personal Time & Self-Care

“I’ve committed to some personal time this evening. Can we discuss this tomorrow?”

“I’m working on balancing my time better. Let’s set a specific time to chat.”

Work-Life Balance 

“I don’t check work emails after 6 PM to maintain work-life balance. I’ll respond during working hours.”

“To ensure productivity, I’m setting specific times for meetings. Does 2 PM work for you?”

Physical Boundaries 

“I’m more comfortable with a handshake than a hug.”

“I value my personal space. I hope you understand.”

Emotional & Mental Health 

“I need some time alone to process things. Can we talk later?”

“This topic is a bit heavy for me right now. Can we switch to something lighter?”

Relationships & Social Situations

“I need a night off from socializing, even if it’s just online. Let’s catch up another day.”

“It’s important for me to spend quality time with my family on weekends.”

Financial Boundaries

 “I’ve set a budget for myself this month and need to stick to it.”

“I’m not comfortable lending money. I hope you can understand.”

Digital & Online Communication

 “I’m taking a digital detox this weekend. If it’s urgent, please call.”

“I’ve set my online status to ‘Do Not Disturb’ during focus hours. I’ll get back to you once I’m available.”

Health & Lifestyle Choices 

“I’ve chosen a vegetarian lifestyle, and I’d appreciate it if you respect my choice.”

“I’m avoiding alcohol right now. Thanks for understanding.”

Conversations & Discussions 

“I’m not comfortable discussing my personal life at work.”

“I’d rather not get into political discussions during family dinners.”

Declining Requests or Invitations 

 “Thank you for thinking of me, but I won’t be able to commit to this project.”

 “I appreciate the invitation, but I have prior commitments on that day.”

Remember, it’s crucial to set boundaries with kindness and clarity. It’s not about being defensive or isolating oneself but ensuring mutual respect and understanding in interactions. These scripts serve as a guide, but personalizing them to fit your specific situation and comfort level is essential.

Regularly Review and Adjust Your Boundaries

Our journey through life is constantly evolving. What may seem like an essential boundary today might change based on life’s transitions. Periodically revisit your boundaries, adjusting as necessary. This ensures that they remain relevant and effective.

The Legacy of Boundaries

By setting and honoring boundaries, we not only elevate our own well-being but also model positive behaviors for those around us. It becomes a generational lesson in self-respect, understanding, and personal space. By nurturing ourselves, we lay the foundation for a future where self-care and mutual respect become inherent values.

Types of Boundaries

There are different types of boundaries. Understanding and setting these boundaries is crucial for maintaining well-being, self-respect, and healthy relationships. Here are some primary types of boundaries:

Physical Boundaries:

  • Pertaining to personal space, physical touch, and privacy.
  • Examples include preferences in closeness with others (like hugging vs. handshaking), or comfort levels with shared living spaces.

Emotional Boundaries:

  • Relate to protecting one’s feelings and ensuring emotional well-being.
  • Examples include deciding to whom you open up about personal experiences or guarding against absorbing others’ emotional states.

Intellectual Boundaries:

  • Concerning thoughts, ideas, and how they’re respected.
  • Examples include being open to debate without feeling attacked or respecting others’ opinions even if they differ from yours.

Time Boundaries:

  • Related to how an individual uses their time.
  • Examples include setting specific work hours, designating personal time, or creating slots for self-care.

Sexual Boundaries:

  • Pertaining to comfort levels and consensual expectations with intimacy.
  • Examples include communication of what is acceptable and what isn’t in an intimate relationship.

Material Boundaries:

  • Relate to money and possessions.
  • Examples include lending items to friends or deciding on shared expenses in relationships.

Digital/Online Boundaries:

  • Concerning the online world and digital communication.
  • Examples include not checking work emails during personal time, setting privacy settings on social media, or deciding when to share personal information online.

Spiritual Boundaries:

  • Pertaining to personal beliefs and practices.
  • Examples include the choice to engage in specific religious practices or the respect for individual spiritual beliefs.

Workplace Boundaries:

  • Specific to professional environments and relationships.
  • Examples include not taking work calls during non-working hours or ensuring a comfortable work environment free from harassment.

Relational or Social Boundaries:

  • Concerning the dynamics within various relationships, be it familial, romantic, or platonic.
  • Examples include setting limits on time spent with certain acquaintances or communicating deal-breakers in romantic relationships.

While these are general categories of boundaries, it’s essential to understand that everyone’s boundaries are personal and can vary widely. What’s comfortable for one person might not be for another. Regular introspection and clear communication are vital in setting and maintaining healthy boundaries.

In the grand tapestry of life, where generational patterns weave in and out, boundaries are the threads of gold. They shimmer with self-worth, resilience, and respect. In creating them, we don’t just preserve our tapestry; we ensure its brilliance is passed down, undimmed, to the generations that follow. Embrace this journey of boundary-setting as one of the most profound acts of self-care, and in doing so, craft a legacy of well-being.

What Boundaries Look Like

Looks Like This:

  • “I appreciate the invite, but tonight’s my personal time. Let’s reschedule!”
  • “I value our conversations, but I need a break from this topic right now.”
  • “I won’t be checking emails after 6 PM to balance work and personal life.”

Doesn’t Look Like This:

  • Overcommitting and then feeling drained or resentful.
  • Consistently allowing negative conversations without voicing discomfort.
  • Responding to work issues round-the-clock without setting hours of unavailability.

Boundaries vs. Rules: Navigating Personal and Collective Guidelines

Boundaries and rules, while sometimes used interchangeably, serve distinct purposes in our interactions and relationships. Understanding the nuanced differences between these two can empower us to foster healthier, more harmonious connections with ourselves and others.

Boundaries: The Personal Protector

  1. Origin: Boundaries are deeply personal and arise from an individual’s needs, experiences, and values. They stem from self-awareness and introspection.
  2. Purpose: Boundaries serve to protect an individual’s emotional, mental, and physical well-being. They delineate what is acceptable and what isn’t for an individual.
  3. Flexibility: While some boundaries may be firm, they can often be flexible, evolving based on one’s growth, experiences, and changing circumstances.
  4. Communication: Boundaries can be silently held or overtly communicated. Expressing them often requires vulnerability, as one needs to articulate personal needs and limits.
  5. Examples: “I need some alone time to recharge,” “I prefer not to discuss my weight,” or “I’m not comfortable lending money.”

Rules: The Collective Framework

  1. Origin: Rules are typically established by a group, community, or institution to provide a structured framework for behavior. They are external standards set to manage and guide group dynamics.
  2. Purpose: Rules aim to create a harmonious, predictable, and often safe environment for everyone within a particular group or setting.
  3. Flexibility: Rules tend to be more rigid than boundaries. They are set standards, and deviations might lead to consequences or penalties.
  4. Communication: Rules are typically overt, written, or stated explicitly, ensuring everyone in the group is aware and can adhere to them.
  5. Examples: “No cell phones in the meeting,” “Library books must be returned within two weeks,” or “No smoking in this area.”

In Essence:

While both boundaries and rules help shape interactions and relationships, they differ in origin, purpose, and flexibility. Boundaries are deeply personal shields, safeguarding an individual’s well-being. In contrast, rules are collective agreements, ensuring group cohesion and harmony. Recognizing and respecting both is pivotal in fostering meaningful, healthy connections.

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Self Care SOS https://www.selfcareschool.org/self-care-sos/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=self-care-sos https://www.selfcareschool.org/self-care-sos/#respond Mon, 04 Dec 2023 02:45:11 +0000 https://www.selfcareschool.org/?p=851 Introducing your Self-Care SOS – a simple, down-to-earth protocol crafted with you in mind, offering guidance to help you regain your balance when everything else feels uncertain. Step 1: Pause and Breathe Begin by finding a quiet space, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Inhale...

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Introducing your Self-Care SOS – a simple, down-to-earth protocol crafted with you in mind, offering guidance to help you regain your balance when everything else feels uncertain.

Step 1: Pause and Breathe

Begin by finding a quiet space, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Inhale deeply for a count of four, hold it for a count of four, and then exhale for a count of four. This simple breathing exercise can help calm your nervous system and bring you back to the present moment.

Step 2: Acknowledge Your Feelings

Allow yourself to acknowledge what you’re feeling without judgment. Whether it’s stress, fear, anxiety, or a mix of emotions, recognizing them is the first step in dealing with them. Remember, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed – you’re human, and your feelings are valid.

Step 3: Engage in a Grounding Activity

Engage in an activity that grounds you. It could be something as simple as sipping a warm cup of tea, wrapping yourself in a cozy blanket, or stepping outside for a breath of fresh air. Choose something that brings a sense of comfort and calmness.

Step 4: Simplify Your Space

A cluttered space can lead to a cluttered mind. Take a few minutes to tidy up your immediate surroundings. It doesn’t have to be a deep clean – just clearing your desk or organizing a small area can make a significant difference.

Step 5: Disconnect to Reconnect

Take a break from digital devices. Continuous exposure to screens and the barrage of information can intensify feelings of overwhelm. Even a brief disconnection can help you reset and recharge.

Step 6: Reflect and Write

Grab a journal or a piece of paper and write down your thoughts. It doesn’t have to be structured or poetic – simply putting your thoughts on paper can be a cathartic and clarifying experience.

Step 7: Reach Out

If you’re feeling up to it, reach out to a friend, family member, or a mental health professional. Sometimes, just talking to someone can lighten the load. Remember, seeking help is a strength, not a weakness.

Step 8: Plan a Comforting Activity

Plan something to look forward to – it could be watching your favorite movie, cooking a meal you love, or planning a walk in a nearby park. Having something enjoyable on the horizon can be a great mood booster.

Final Thoughts

During times of distress, it’s important to remember that self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential. This Self-Care SOS is your go-to guide for those moments when you need a helping hand to bring you back to a state of balance and peace. Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t just about feeling better in the moment; it’s about equipping yourself to face the challenges of tomorrow with renewed strength and clarity.

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Self Care Day: How to Plan the Perfect Day of Self Care for Where You Are Right Now https://www.selfcareschool.org/self-care-day/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=self-care-day https://www.selfcareschool.org/self-care-day/#respond Sat, 02 Dec 2023 01:28:00 +0000 https://selfcareschool.org/?p=74 Self care is an important part of your well-being. We all know that we need to take time for ourselves, but it can be hard to know where to start. That’s why it’s helpful to have a plan for self care. In this article, we will discuss how to plan the ultimate self care day....

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Self care is an important part of your well-being. We all know that we need to take time for ourselves, but it can be hard to know where to start. That’s why it’s helpful to have a plan for self care.

In this article, we will discuss how to plan the ultimate self care day. This day should be all about you, and it should help you feel great.

What is self care?

Self care is anything that you do to take care of yourself. This can include physical, mental, and emotional self care.

Physical self care might involve taking a relaxing bath, going for a walk, or getting a massage. Mental self care might involve reading a book, journaling, or meditating.

Emotional self care can involve spending time with friends, talking to a therapist, or doing something that makes you happy.

Mental self care is often overlooked, but it is just as important as physical self care. When you are taking care of your mental health, you are better able to handle stress and manage your emotions.

Learning to identify your needs on any given day is a skill. For some, it comes easy. For others, especially those with a lot of deep trauma, it can be more difficult.

Two tools you can use to get better at it are mindfulness and nervous system regulation.

Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment. This means not letting your thoughts wander off into the past or the future.

Nervous system regulation is about learning to control your body’s stress response. When you are able to regulate your nervous system, you will feel more calm and relaxed.

Both of these skills can be learned through therapy, and they can be useful in your self care practice.

What are your self care needs?

Before you can plan the ultimate self care day, you need to know what your self care needs are. This will vary from person to person.

To figure out what your self care needs are, start by paying attention to how you feel. Do you feel stressed? Anxious? Depressed? Tired? These are all signs that you might need to focus on self care.

Another way to figure out your self care needs is to think about what makes you happy. What activities make you feel good? When do you feel most relaxed?

Although it’s not perfect, I also like to look at Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs to get an idea of what self care activities I might need to focus on.

The hierarchy starts with the most basic needs, like food and shelter, and goes up to self-actualization needs, like self-awareness and self-fulfillment.

If you absolutely don’t know what your needs are, then start with mindfulness and nervous system regulation.

"How to Plan the Ultimate Self Care Day" is the caption on a photo of a self care kit containing a candle, journal, and mug are sitting near a window with a red pillow atop a plush white blanket.

Planning A Self Care Day

First, pick a day when you can have some uninterrupted time. This may mean taking a day off from work or making sure that your family and friends know that you need some alone time.

You also need to decide where you’ll be spending your self-care day. Will you be staying at home, or going somewhere else? If you’re going somewhere, make sure it’s somewhere that you feel comfortable and safe.

Whether you feel like staying home or retreating to somewhere else, you have a few options:

  • A quiet, cute Airbnb: This can be a great option if you want to get away from your everyday surroundings but don’t want to spend a lot of money. Make sure to pick a place that has good reviews and is in a safe neighborhood.
  • A day at a spa: If you’re looking to treat yourself, then consider spending a day at a local spa. This is a great way to relax and pamper yourself.
  • A day in nature: Spend a day hiking, sit by a lake, or take a walk in the park. Being in nature can help you feel more connected to the world and can be very calming.
  • At home: If you want to stay home, that’s totally fine! self care days are about doing what makes you happy and relaxed.
  • A private hotel room: This can be a great option if you want complete privacy and don’t want to be disturbed.

Once you have your day and your location picked out, it’s time to start planning what you’re going to do.

What are the self care day activities?

The activities you choose are going to vary widely depending on what care you need to give yourself.

Maybe you know exactly what you need: a day of pampering or just some time alone to read.

If you have no idea what you need, start by practicing mindfulness and nervous system regulation.

Self Care Foundation: Practicing Mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness can help you be more present in the moment. This can be helpful when you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed.

To practice mindfulness, find a comfortable place to sit or lie down. Close your eyes and focus on your breath. Pay attention to the way your body feels as you breathe.

Notice any thoughts that come into your mind, but don’t focus on them. Let them come and go without judgment.

If your mind starts to wander, that’s okay. Just gently bring your focus back to your breath.

Self Care Foundation: Nervous System Regulation

Nervous system regulation is about learning to control your body’s stress response. When you can regulate your nervous system, you will feel more calm and relaxed. You can also handle challenges much more powerfully.

There are a few different ways to do this. One way is to focus on your breathing.

Take a deep breath in through your nose, letting your stomach expand. Then breathe out slowly through your mouth.

Another way to help regulate your nervous system is to practice progressive muscle relaxation. This involves tensing and relaxing different muscle groups in your body.

Start by tensing your toes for 5 seconds, then relax them. Work your way up through your entire body, tensing and relaxing each muscle group as you go.

Movement, cold therapy, and spending time in nature are also very effective forms of nervous system regulation.

Movement can be anything from yoga to dancing to just going for a walk.

Cold therapy can be as simple as taking a cold shower or putting an ice pack on your neck.

Spending time in nature has been shown to decrease stress levels and increase happiness.

As you plan your self care day, here are some more activities to consider including:

Mental Health Self Care Activities

There are many self care activities that can help improve your mental health.

Some self-care activities for mental health include:

  • Yoga
  • Meditation
  • Spending time in nature
  • Journaling
  • Creative hobbies
  • Spending time with friends and family
  • Reading or listening to personal development books

Physical Self Care Activities

Physical self care is just as important as mental self care. When your body feels good, it impacts everything else.

Some self care activities for physical health include:

  • Eating a healthy diet
  • Exercising
  • Skincare and beauty treatments
  • Getting enough sleep
  • Taking breaks
  • Stretching
  • Taking care of your hair and skin

More Self Care Ideas

There are endless self-care activities you can do to feel your best. Here are a few more ideas:

  • Take a relaxing bath
  • Make yourself a healthy meal
  • Organize your space
  • Watch a funny movie
  • Create a budget and pay bills
  • Make a list of goals
  • Write in your journal
  • Take a nature walk
  • Play with a pet
  • Take yourself on a date
  • Do your nails or give yourself a pedicure

Any day can be a self care day if you take time to focus on fulfilling your needs. Whether you’re just taking some time out for yourself or planning the ultimate self care day, the activities in this post can help you feel your best.

What are your favorite self care activities? How often do you take a self care day? Share with us in the comments below!

Photo by Chelsea shapouri on Unsplash

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How to Make Money When You Have a Mental Illness https://www.selfcareschool.org/how-to-make-money-when-you-have-a-mental-illness/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-to-make-money-when-you-have-a-mental-illness https://www.selfcareschool.org/how-to-make-money-when-you-have-a-mental-illness/#respond Fri, 17 Nov 2023 22:35:00 +0000 https://www.selfcareschool.org/?p=834 Dealing with a mental illness adds another layer of challenges onto life – which is already hard. One area that tends to show up is in providing for yourself financially. In the way our society is set up right now, we all need money to survive, and holding a conventional job may sometimes seem like...

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Dealing with a mental illness adds another layer of challenges onto life – which is already hard. One area that tends to show up is in providing for yourself financially. In the way our society is set up right now, we all need money to survive, and holding a conventional job may sometimes seem like an insurmountable challenge.

Challenges with Regular Employment

For those with mental illnesses, there are a number of challenges that pop up when it comes to holding traditional employment – that is, a regular, 9-5 j-o-b JOB.

  1. Inconsistency in Performance: Fluctuations in mood or energy levels can make it tough to maintain consistent job performance.
  2. Stigmatization: Some workplaces lack understanding or awareness about mental illnesses, leading to potential bias or discrimination.
  3. Demanding Schedules: Conventional 9-5 jobs might not align with the energy or focus levels of someone grappling with a mental illness.
  4. Physical Demands: Jobs requiring intense physical exertion can exacerbate symptoms for some individuals.
  5. Social Pressures: Occupations that necessitate extensive social interaction can be draining for people with anxiety disorders, BPD, or other conditions.

Fortunately, there are multiple alternative ways to make a living, even when facing such challenges. In fact, there are more opportunities now than ever before when it comes to carving out your own way of making a living. Here’s a guide to understanding the hurdles and exploring potential income sources.

Alternative Income Methods

  1. Freelancing: Platforms like Upwork and Fiverr offer flexibility in choosing projects aligned with your pace and skill set.
  2. Online Sales: Platforms like Etsy or eBay allow you to sell handmade crafts, upcycled items, or collectibles.
  3. Online Tutoring/Teaching: Share knowledge in areas you’re passionate about via platforms like VIPKid or Chegg Tutors.
  4. Blogging or Vlogging: Share your journey, passions, or experiences. Over time, ad revenue or affiliate marketing can add up.
  5. Pet Services: Love animals? Consider dog walking or pet sitting through apps like Rover.
  6. Rideshare or Delivery: Apps like Uber or DoorDash offer flexibility based on when you feel up to working.
  7. Remote Work: Seek remote positions that allow you to work from the comfort of your home.
  8. Craft or Farmer’s Markets: Showcase your creations or produce to your local community.
  9. Investments: With careful planning and perhaps some advice, investing can be a source of passive income.

Tips for Success

  1. Start Small: Don’t rush. Take one step at a time, ensuring you’re comfortable with your chosen method.
  2. Build a Support Network: Connect with others who have similar experiences. They can offer advice, resources, and emotional support.
  3. Set Boundaries: Ensure you have personal time to recover and manage your health.
  4. Stay Informed: Continuously learn about new platforms, methods, and resources to optimize your income streams.
  5. Seek Guidance: Therapists, counselors, or even career coaches can offer tailored advice.
  6. Celebrate Small Wins: Every achievement, no matter how minor, is a step forward. Recognize and applaud your progress.

Living with a mental illness is undoubtedly challenging, but remember that your well-being and health are paramount. Financial stability is attainable, and with perseverance and the right strategies, you can navigate the professional world on your own terms.

If you are in an emergency situation, it’s a good idea to reach out to local support services. In the U.S., you can get connected to services by dialing 211.

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3 Ways to Develop Self Awareness https://www.selfcareschool.org/3-ways-to-develop-self-awareness/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=3-ways-to-develop-self-awareness https://www.selfcareschool.org/3-ways-to-develop-self-awareness/#comments Tue, 07 Nov 2023 17:19:14 +0000 https://www.selfcareschool.org/?p=842 In a famous study on self awareness, 95% of participants indicated that they are self aware. What researchers found? Is that only 15% actually are. 🙈 So, it looks like *most* of us could stand to develop our self awareness: Here are three strategies to help you do that: 1. Keep a Daily Journal Writing...

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In a famous study on self awareness, 95% of participants indicated that they are self aware.

What researchers found? Is that only 15% actually are. 🙈

So, it looks like *most* of us could stand to develop our self awareness: Here are three strategies to help you do that:

1. Keep a Daily Journal

Writing about your day, your thoughts, and how you felt can help you identify patterns in your behavior and thinking. It’s a space for self-reflection and honesty. Over time, you might find links between your actions and your emotional states, which can be insightful for personal development.

2. Set Aside Time for Self-Reflection

Dedicate a few minutes each day to self-reflection. This can be a moment of silence in the morning or a meditative walk in the evening. Use this time to ask yourself questions like, “What am I feeling right now?” or “Why did I react that way today?”

3. Experiment with Your Comfort Zone

Stepping out of your comfort zone can reveal a lot about your limits, fears, and potential. Try new things, whether it’s a different type of food, a new exercise routine, or even striking up a conversation with a stranger. Observe how these experiences make you feel and what they teach you about your preferences and aversions.

When do you feel most self-aware?

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How to Meditate for Beginners https://www.selfcareschool.org/how-to-meditate-for-beginners/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-to-meditate-for-beginners https://www.selfcareschool.org/how-to-meditate-for-beginners/#comments Fri, 03 Nov 2023 20:56:27 +0000 https://selfcareschool.org/?p=161 Meditation is an incredibly powerful tool that can help you manage stress, improve your focus, and boost your overall well-being. If you’re new to meditation, it can seem a bit overwhelming at first. There are so many different ways to meditate, and it’s hard to know where to start. In this post, we’ll give you...

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Meditation is an incredibly powerful tool that can help you manage stress, improve your focus, and boost your overall well-being. If you’re new to meditation, it can seem a bit overwhelming at first. There are so many different ways to meditate, and it’s hard to know where to start.

In this post, we’ll give you a crash course in meditation for beginners. We’ll cover what meditation is, the benefits of meditation, different types of meditation, and how to get started with meditation. By the end of this post, you’ll have everything you need to start your own meditation practice.

What is Meditation?

Meditation is an ancient practice that has been used for centuries to promote relaxation and mindfulness. Meditation involves focusing your attention on a single object or activity and letting thoughts come and go without judgment. When you meditate, you can focus on your breath, a mantra or affirmation, or a specific question or problem that you’re trying to solve. The goal of meditation is not to clear your mind of all thoughts, but simply to observe your thoughts without getting caught up in them.

Benefits of Meditation

There are countless benefits of meditation. A regular meditation practice can help reduce stress and anxiety, improve sleep quality, increase focus and concentration, boost self-awareness, and promote overall well-being. If you’re new to meditation, it’s important to start slow and be patient. It takes time and practice to see the full benefits of meditation.

Types of Meditation

There are many different types of meditation practices, but here are some of the most popular:

• Mindfulness Meditation: Mindfulness meditation involves focusing on your breath and being present in the moment without judgment. This type of meditation can be helpful for managing stress and anxiety.

• Guided Meditation: Guided meditations involve following along with a pre-recorded audio track that includes instructions and often soothing music or nature sounds. Guided meditations are great for beginners who want some structure to their practice.

• Visualization Meditation: Visualization meditations involve creating mental images of things you want to manifest in your life. This could be anything from success in your career to better health or relationships.

• Transcendental Meditation: Transcendental meditation involves repeating a mantra or affirmation while seated with your eyes closed. This type of meditation can be helpful for promoting relaxation and reducing stress.

Easy Meditation Techniques for Beginners

1) Commit to 1 Minute: One of the biggest barriers to starting a meditation practice is thinking that you don’t have enough time. The good news is that you don’t need hours out of your day to meditate! A good place to start is by committing to 1 minute per day. Once you’ve built up a regular practice, you can gradually increase the amount of time you meditate each day as it feels comfortable for you.

2) Find a Quiet, Comfortable Place: It’s important to find a quiet place where you won’t be interrupted when you meditate. If possible, find a place where you can sit comfortably with your back straight and your feet flat on the ground. You might want to sit in a chair with good posture or cross-legged on a cushion on the floor.

3) Try a Guided Meditation: If thoughts constantly racing through your mind make it difficult for you concentrate on meditating, try listening to a guided meditation instead! Guided meditations provide instructions and often include soothing music or nature sounds in the background which can help relax your mind and body so that you can more easily focus on the present moment.

4) Focus on Your Breath: One simple way to meditate is to focus on your breath as it moves in and out of your body. As thoughts arise during your mediation (and they will!), simply observe them without judgment and return your focus back onto your breath.

Creating a Meditation Space

If you want to create a dedicated space for your meditation practice, there are a few things you’ll need:

• A comfortable place to sit or recline: This could be a cushioned chair with good posture, a yoga mat or blanket on the floor, or a pillow. Just make sure that whatever you’re sitting on is comfortable enough that you won’t be distracted by discomfort during your meditation.

• A place to keep your meditation props: This could be a small table or shelf near your seating area. Some things you might want to keep nearby include a timer, some soothing music or nature sounds, and a pillow or cushion. You could also keep some incense handy if that appeals to you. It’s also nice to have a journal nearby so that you can jot down any thoughts or insights that arise during your practice.

• A place to hang a special piece of artwork or keep a plant: This is completely optional, but some people like to create a space that feels calm and sacred. Hang up a special piece of artwork or keep a plant in your meditation area to help create a sense of peace.

Tips for Sticking With It

1) Set a regular time: One of the best ways to make sure you stick with your meditation practice is to set a regular time for it each day. If you can, meditate at the same time each day so that it becomes part of your daily routine.

2) Keep it short: As a beginner, it’s best to keep your meditation sessions short so that you don’t get discouraged. If you only have 5 or 10 minutes to spare, that’s fine! You can always increase the length of your sessions as you get more comfortable with the practice.

3) Don’t worry about doing it perfectly: Meditation is not about clearing your mind of all thoughts or sitting perfectly still. It’s perfectly normal for your mind to wander during meditation, and that’s okay! Just gently bring your focus back to your breath whenever you notice that your thoughts have drifted.

4) Find a comfortable position: You don’t have to sit in lotus position or any other particular way to meditate. Just find a position that you can maintain for the duration of your session without getting too uncomfortable.

5) Be patient: Like with anything else, it takes time and practice to get good at meditation. Don’t expect to be a master meditator overnight! Just keep with it and be patient with yourself.

Facing Difficulties While Meditating

Remember, the goal of mediation is not perfection but simply showing up each day with an open mind and heart. If you find it difficult to quiet your mind during meditation, don’t worry!

It’s normal for your thoughts to wander, and it takes time and practice to be able to focus on the present moment. Be patient with yourself and know that every little bit counts. Over time, you’ll likely find it easier and more enjoyable to meditate.

We wish you well on your journey inward! Please feel free inform us about any experiences – positive OR negative – about starting (or continuing) a mediation practice.

Meditation FAQ

Q: What if I can’t sit still for long periods of time?

A: If you can’t sit still or find it uncomfortable to do so, try lying down on your back with your feet about hip-width apart and your arms resting by your sides. Once you’re settled, close your eyes and focus on your breath. If your mind starts to wander, simply observe the thoughts without judgment and return your focus back to your breath.

Q: What if I don’t have time to meditate?

A: It’s important to make time for meditation, but life can be busy! If you find it difficult to set aside time for a longer meditation, start by committing to 1 minute per day. Once you’ve built up a regular practice, you can gradually increase the amount of time you meditate each day as it feels comfortable for you.

Q: I find it hard to focus on my breath. What should I do?

A: If you find it difficult to focus on your breath, try focusing on a mantra instead. A mantra is a short, simple phrase that you repeat to yourself during meditation. Pick a phrase that is meaningful to you or simply make up a word that you can repeat. For example, you might say “breathe in, breathe out” or “inhale, exhale.”

Q: I get anxious when I meditate. What should I do?

A: If you find yourself feeling anxious during meditation, it’s important to remember that this is normal! The goal of meditation is not to clear your mind of all thoughts but simply to observe them without judgment. If you find it difficult to let go of anxious thoughts, try focusing on your breath or a mantra to help you stay present. You might also want to try a guided meditation which can help relax your mind and body.

Q: I get distracted easily when I meditate. What should I do?

A: If you find yourself getting easily distracted during meditation, try focusing on your breath or a mantra to help you stay present. You might also want to try a guided meditation which can help relax your mind and body.

Q: I don’t know if I’m doing it right. How can I tell?

A: There is no “right” way to meditate, so don’t worry about whether or not you’re doing it correctly! The goal of meditation is simply to show up each day with an open mind and heart. Over time, you’ll likely find it easier and more enjoyable to meditate.

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